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Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Behind Domestic Violence– A Fiction Depiction


In India more than 55% of women suffer from domestic violence. But is it only physical that qualifies for violence against women? I don’t buy this fact, violence of thoughts that thrashes women internally, makes her loose her confidence and her existence, is even worse. Physical wounds may heal tomorrow but the inner marks won’t.


This post is about a girl, whom I got to know virtually around 3 years back. We met on facebook and started to chat randomly. Today you might not get to see her or feel her, neither would this post make any difference to her, but being her virtual friend least I can do is let people know her.

Friends of friends setting of facebook, helped me get acquainted to her when she liked one of my blog post. Tabassum (name changed). Her profile photo was of a beautiful sunflower. Somehow we began with poking and then chatting. As I got to know her, she was a housewife in her mid 20’s. Her husband was a business man. Born and brought up in Bhopal, she moved to Kolkata after her marriage. In her alone time she used to surf internet to know some more of the world around.

I was on my annual leave those days, so with ample free time we got to chat more.

During our usual conversations, one day she asked me, “What do you usually wear? Do you wear kurtis and those colourful leggings which are in fashion these days”
I replied, “I mostly live in Kurtis and leggings”.
“I love them too, I can’t get my eyes off them when I go to the market” she said excitedly.
“So you too like to wear them?”
“I wish I could but my husband doesn’t like them. Though he doesn’t have a problem but my in-laws…..”
“So you should speak to your husband and make him understand that kurtis shouldn’t be a problem, infact half of India wears them today.”
“They are not much educated and have an orthodox mindset. My husband too is a college dropout.”
“Hmm… and by the way what have studied?”
“I have masters in computer science, but what’s the use they won’t let me work, it’s not in their traditions. L

Heavy in heart, I could type a word to that. Is this what India is?... How can a girl live with so many restrictions and boundations?

A few days later, it was the time when I met my husband and started falling for him, with love on my mind I made a random post on my blog about love, reading which she pinged me.

“So are you in love?”
“Yes luckily, have you ever fallen in love”
“Yes, in college days I had a boyfriend.”
“Then what happened, why didn’t you get married to him?”
“My parents didn’t approve of him, and arranged my marriage”
“What about your guy”
“I had to surrender to my parents wish and forget him”
“So do you love your husband now”
“Now as I have his child in my womb, it has to be love right?”
“What… are you expecting?”
“Yes… 7 months”
“Wow… all the best”

Since then, we chatted frequently, and she used to talk about her child and how she is developing and loving the feeling inside her. She wanted a son. Though she didn’t give me a valid reason to this, I knew that she won’t want her daughter to face similar situations in life.

When she was 8 months pregnant, she went to her maternal home to deliver the child. Since she didn’t have internet there, she promised be in touch on phone and inform me when the baby arrives.

After a few days she called me, and told me about her health and that her baby shower function went off well and her husband gifted her gold jewellery which was much of a reason of jealousy for her in-laws. I was annoyed. She was going through such beautiful phase of her life and they are being so insensitive.

Within 20 days, I got a text saying she delivered a baby boy as she wanted. I was very happy for her.

It was a peak season at my office, so I got buzy with work and had less time for social networking. Guess she too got occupied with her new baby.

Then one day she called me.
“Hi there!”
It was an unknown mobile no, so I asked, “Who’s this?”
“Tabassum here. You forgot”
She was sounding very happy but unfortunately I was buzy that moment, so promised to get back to her soon. But that soon didn’t come any sooner.

Then one day, a common friend of me and Tabassum pinged me.
“Did you get to know about Tabassum”
“No. What happened?”
“Her baby died”
“What?????!!!! HOWWW?” I was shocked to hear that.
“Her husband lifted the baby, and the baby slipped and got hit on head. Died on the way to hospital”
“How is Tabassum ?”
“Her neighbor told that she is shattered and out of her senses completely”

I remembered her dreams about her baby and of her life with the baby. The lists she had made for her baby needs, the names she had chosen, all gone now.

Few months passed, one day I texted the same friend on Watsapp to know about Tabassum.
“Hi. Any news of Tabassum?”
“What… You don’t know?”
“No… is she fine?”
“She is dead”
“Nooooooo… how do you know?”
“Same neighbor, also a friend of mine, told me. She had got cancer and her husband left her that time. She succumbed to her ailment and worries.”

I was thoughtless and speechless. How can life be so unfair to anyone? She knew no joy in her life, one joy that she got in the form of her baby was also gone. She died every moment after her baby died and to top it all her husband left her with all her troubles. She suffered the pain both physical and emotional.

What was her fault… had she asked for any thing unconventional?
Only wearing Kurtis and leggings and having her baby? Is it a lot for any girl to ask?
Her love, education, lifestyle, freedom, dreams, baby, family everything got snatched one by one.

Hope she is more than happy with her baby in heaven.

Don’t know how many Tabassum’s are dying everyday in India. Each one of us should stand for ourselves and for our rights. It’s high time now!!!!







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