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Tuesday, February 28, 2012

I am an independent women… but **sigh** it doesn’t help???


Sometimes, the burden of being an independent woman gets too much. It makes me too strong to lean on anybody, forces me to have a mind of my own on everything.

Grown up with under the protection of a women with unbelievably strong ideas, someone who changed many things in that time and age and a man who helped me follow my dreams. I grew up to be an overwhelmed feminist during my college days and believed my economic and emotional independence was a right I couldn't be denied. But after years of being one handling the changing dramatic life…  it gets tiring, fighting every minute to be what you want to be. It would be so easy to give it all up, but believe me it isn't. There are not one but many days when I want to let this whole idea slip off, of being a strong willed emancipated thinking woman and stumble in nothingness. Be vain, lead a life like other simple married girls I know are living and let people ride over me without minding it.

But there's a voice inside me that won't allow me to do any of that, spurring me on to shun all vestiges of dependence, holding me up when I would rather drop down and rest. It isn't easy to carry on at all times, showing myself as a brave girl, but it's lot more difficult to stop or turn back now.

Sometimes I feel sad for women around me who haven't had the privilege to come into their own yet by choice or not. There are days when I feel jealous: wouldn't it be easy to let others' decide the course of your life, to go with the flow simply, rather than walking against the tide? And here I am, struggling everyday with the small and big decisions of my life - from managing daily chores at work to thinking about the alternatives when I can give it all up to have children, from making small mental notes about how I would bring up a son or a daughter to helping spouse evolve out of the patriarchal society he grew up in. I look at the other metro women who don't consider marriage at even 30 and then I look at my cousins and friends who have had children in early twenties itself, and how I wish I wasn't stuck somewhere in-between!

It's very easy to say 'Go with your heart' or ‘Do what your heart says’. But opposites wrench my heart making me feel mysterious to myself!

Monday, February 27, 2012

Television can also judge you !!!!


Television is a part of my everyday life.. reach home, grab a glass of water, some snackiee or fruit, switch on the TV, and push FAV button. That’s what I do when I reach home. I like to watch soulfull  lively characters and funny series with some meaningful factors here and there. Something in which I don’t have to apply too much of my mind to. After all after day long work, another heavy watch is not what u would want ? I have a special place in my heart for bollywood movies and simple hilarious characters of daily soaps- Suhana (Sasural Genda phool) or Khushi (Is pyar ko kya naam du). I love watching them in free time when am too tired to even think. I know sometimes they are silly but make me laugh surely. When it gives me pleasure at one time, the other time it can be equally irritating, like it was while watching a few reality shows.

All these simple pleasures of life, feels so wonderful when you look back through them but it depends on you how you would want these, especially television, is it a real box of entertainment or a box of information or box of irritation. It can give you numerous memories from silly remote fights with brother or spouse to the news coverage of disasters happening in another corner of the world that you witness live sitting on your couch. It surely is one discovery that has evolved not only urban but also the rural India.

But what if you are to be judged based on what you watch on television….

Then I guess I am one confused soul … lollzz

I WATCH
  • Master Chef
  • Nigella Feasts
  • Highway on my plate
  • Chakh Le India
  • Etc etc
Going by that, I'm sometimes a glutton, a gourmet, a closet-chef, a connoisseur. But I won’t call myself any of that, yes I love to eat anything that pampers my taste buds, but actually think twice before trying my hands on it…

I ALSO WATCH:
  • Roadies
  • Bigg Boss
  • Khatron Ke Khiladi
  • Splitsvilla
  • Band Bajaa Bride
  • And sundry reality shows
Does that make me a drama queen? A vain observer?

AND I ALSO WATCH:
  • Hindi soaps like Sasural Genda Phool, Is pyar ko kya naam dun and a few more
Does that make me a couch potato? A soap junkie?

AND I ALSO WATCH:
  • Travel shows like
  • Confessions of a travel Bag
  • Free Fall
  • Life’s a Beach
  • No big deal
  • And News, debates or coffee shows
Does that make me an intellectual, a thinking viewer, a half-geek?

so based on this, what kind of a person are you, if we judge you by what you watch on TV?



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