Yesterday I read not one but two shocking cases of biasedness
against girls in this day and age, which kind of forced me to write this post….
First was a quote by the principal of a Kanpur College, Meeta Jamal, that says
girls who wear jeans will be expelled from the college, since this is the only
way to stop crime against women…. (What ???? excuse me!!!!)
Second was that a Haryana man beat his wife in a marketplace
when she was out shopping with her parents wearing jeans.
In this issue, I can’t say a man is biased against women,
there are women too who live in some centuries old era as well. When the man in
above incident was asked his reason for the act… he said….
Do you know what this
means…. ??? tomorrow she could ask for more… may be to keep her girl child
also??? Or the right to be educated and work???
What do you think girls... being able to wear what we like… is about
being disrespectful to society, especially when it’s a pair of jeans, which has
the capability to hide all the nudity of the women… didn’t he see that when travelling
alone, she can jump and run, even over the fences or cross road without the
fear of tripping over.
Why… isn’t it just a pair of blue denim jeans??
No.. it is not!!!
Many UP and bihar colleges ban it!!!
Managlore bans it
Taliban sacks it
Grand parents criticize it …
And all hypocrites hate it!!!
Moreover our society’s conditioning is awesome… … If I say, Fine, Denim is a western trend… but
Our men all over, be it any age or size, flaunt it proudly…
choose the latest trend amongst it…arent they being modern!!!!
But fashion is not for girls…. Does it symbolizes freedom…
independence or something beyond!!!
I would say it’s not the man but the fear that has been instigated
in him since childhood by the well-known patriarchal society of India.
The notion that girls should wear in a certain way, just like
many other things, she should do in a certain way.
Why some men cant think of supporting her choices. I have
seen men who stood by their wives (my dad is one of them), and generally when a man
stands with his wife, nobody in India says anything anymore.
In the mentioned case of Haryana man, why was he so
ignorant? Because he has probably grown up seeing men disrespecting women and
teaching them how to behave. May be domestic violence is a part of their life
in this part of the country… And we have seen the result of such thinking!!!
What he would have probably thought is ..WHAT WILL OTHER
ELDERLY PEOPLE THINK (MOSTLY ELDERS IN FAMILY, NEIGHBORHOOD), IF THEY COME TO
KNOW THAT MY WIFE IS NOT A SARI-CLAD WOMAN, but someone who can wear Jeans (still
considered modern in most part of India). This would probably give a bad name
to me and my parents as well. But he forgot that, she is an adult as well, a
married woman, and she was shopping with her own parents! AREN’T A GIRL’S
PARENTS ELDERS IN THIS COUNTRY!
Why is being modern a kind of terror for many… the terror
that made this man beat his wife while she was shopping with her own parents!! What
has happened to our wonderful family values, and this social system that
prevented her parents from taking that violent bully to the court!
No wonder that nobody wants to have daughters in
Haryana?
It’s not only about wearing jeans, we have issues with a girl
having any say in her own life. The jeans are just a symbol used here. There
are many other such restrictions. It’ s more about not letting her go out of
control. About hypocrisy, insecurities, selfish parenting, and inferiority
complexes. And the problem is not limited to man being biased towards women,
but there are women like Meeta Jamal too…
Just think, how would you like to be in such a situation?
With a family that doesn’t really care for you, and wants to control every part
of your life? Just think. We are human and sometimes that can make us very
inhuman!
Shadan,
ReplyDeleteNice to see you back after a break. Very pertinent post. First of all wearing jeans is not a fashion but normal way of casual dressing. A lot of social awakening is needed for gender equality. Girls need to be given not only equal status but with more protection. I know that one dresses as per own comfort but it is for both Men and Women to dress appropriately and behave in dignified manner. To give some examples of undignified dress - Would the society accept a man dressed in very tight body hugging pants clearly outlining his genitals? At least I will not. Similarly transparent suits or blouses should be avoided. Also no one, be it male or female, should be in low waist jeans with short top exposing vulgarly while bending or sitting. We need to be more tolerant towards dress codes for both genders as long as those are within decent norms.
Take care
Thank you Jack, yes was struggling with health a lil bit last few days, thats why the long break. But yes this patriarchal society biasedness towards girls, bothers me a lot. I couldn't stop myself from writing this post after reading these two news items. I can't change the society, but at least can initiate awareness. TC.
ReplyDeleteShadan,
DeleteHow are you feeling now? Please do take necessary precautions in summers. Also do follow doctor's advice fully and take due medicines. If you feel comfortable, you may write to me at my id niceguy251@gmail.com .
Take care
Dear Shadan,
ReplyDeleteVery strongly you put your points forward .. Im sure your article will make few people think about it .. specially new generation ... You can change the society by writing such strong points ... Yes you are not alone ... we all are with you ... Wish you good health :).. Please TC ...
Thanks Shradha... no matter what we say or want to do.. still sometimes we too bow infront of this patriarchal society. Its about being strong in ourselves, to stop this criticism against us.
ReplyDelete